believe or not...
busy buys buys....my mind,body and etc are so busy with so many things in life...project judging coming and report have just been done...finally have some time to relax and write something here....actually should say im somehow very bored now..but no choice,i have to learn wat is independent by my own now....
in school now...but i still cannot go home...have to stay in school doing nothing for the next 2-3hrs....wat am i going to do...???
everybody is so busy...don want to disturb them...and the rest,don even know where they are...i am alone now...so sian...i don want to think of anything now but wat am i going to do now...
is wat my friend said is true..that all people find u for a reason...when they don need u...they wont even think of u...not even to say will come and find u....sometimes in life....i don know how to walk too...just walk as people walk...don even know the route is the correct one or not...
maybe im so stupid...why should i care about all this...but i treat all friends equally...just that the equally is diff in the aspect of diff people....but why...i don get it sometimes...
take it as im writing crap....i don know wat to do sometimes too...just continue to walk on ba....maybe i will really find the things i really want to have....
tired....
so...
tired.....
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
1:05 PM
busy busy week...
hmmm....i have been very busy with alot of school works and project...have been staying out late in school for the past few weeks....hmmm....can say i finally got something for my project but then still the same problems...cannot work as a whole...so still have to continue...and of coz the report too...gonna be another busy week next week again...
havnt been in right mood recently too...have been thinking alot of things...have been doing alot of weird things too....words hit me hard this week too...friends words really hit me hard...been thinking of wat they have said to me....and reflect...it hard to make it like wat u all said...but trying is the most i can do now....
what am i going to do....????
really thinking hard now...i hate myself...
hate...
hate...
hate...
the hatred is so much more than i ever think of......coz i really feel the more i think i am ok...i got a feeling that i am not...
How come...???
i also don know....
just feel very tired....in everything....mentally...physically too.....
just....
exhauted.........
until a stage that my mind can be set to rest forever at any time even without me knowing it.......
Saturday, November 24, 2007
2:20 AM
wats the most important now...???
hmmm....maybe i also don really know what is the most important thingy for me now....been in very confusing mood....
talk about another thing first...finally got off the PR3...work for so many nights of project...the time i spent in sch becoming more and more than me at home....but just don know why the project still doesnt work...
havnt we tried hard enough...???
sometimes life is like that...alot of thingy u wanted so much to get the answer but alway...the answer will never reach you if u never ask or after u tried....
sometimes really lost alot of hopes in my life...why this year am i like this...when will the bad luck go away...or is it the sins i done is still so much till i must repay everything...tired...really tired....but sometimes stress,pressure and etc make u no choice but to continue to walk on...
Important to me....i no longer know which one is the most anymore...alot of things/people keep disappoint me...maybe i do disappoint all of them too ba...but in mind...or rather say in everyone mind...there sure be something in their mind that they want so much....
that include me of coz...i know it not gonna be easy...or soon impossible...but don know....keep on jiayou....
Look Don't Last....
Character and Attitude Last...
Remember....
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
11:17 PM
coldness and hotness...
today is a public holiday....so i shall wish everyone a Happy Deepavali Day first....
then back to me again...today only went out awhile to prepare something....then was staying at home for the rest of the day...just spend the holiday like that...but still i refelected myself too...telling myself wat should be done...wat should not too....
the coldness.....
the hotness....
the neutral....
the everything....
make me realise alot alot...
the talk...
the advice....
the wait...
the reflection....
make me realise even more....
no hope...then there will be no disppointment...is it true...???
i not sure...but in my mind...i have tried not to have any hope for anything ba...just continue on....
i believe GOD and also my family are there for me even if i have done the very wrong thingy...but...i will reflect myself to get myself even better....i believe i can do that....
before u know how to love one....
u must know how to love yourself....
Thursday, November 08, 2007
11:29 PM
