Am I Stupid?
It's been so long that i'm feeling this way, I'm talking about whether I'm a kind of person who are so stupid till people can used me? In this political world, I've wearing different masks to face different groups of people, which make me feeling so unhappy now.
"Happy" is like a distant "relative" from me, "he" is like already left me for so long without even have an idea to come back to see me at all. "He" left his "brother" unhappy to me, so it means wherever i go, "he" followed me.
Why?
I'm a human, a real human being living in this world. Do I really deserve the treatment that I'm getting now? I didn't do anything really that bad to deserve this few years of sufferings and is still continuing. I just want to lead my life back like in the past, can I?
Who do I understand me?
Who is the person?
Everything seem so fake to me, even myself. I just wish that when I eventually leave the army, everything will "go". But that is like what i said before i entered the army. Everything stayed the same, instead of getting better, it got worse.
Friday, July 02, 2010
7:22 PM